I may be about to rant here. And I may have no right to do so because I do not have my own children, I don't have them nagging me 24-7, I'm not a single mother wanting a break and I don't know 4 year olds quite like the parent of one. BUT. I think I'm being fairly sane and rational in screaming WHY THE HECK WERE THERE 3 AND 4 YEAR OLDS AT THE SIMPSONS MOVIE TONIGHT?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Jordan and I decided we'd go see the movie. Jordan got cheap tickets and he's been a fan for a while. Besides which, before Harry Potter the last movie we'd seen was The Nativity Story...SO, movie-going is a rare occasion for us.
We got to the theatre early (oh the excitement! And I love previews...of which there were TWO!) and picked out good seats. Not long after CHILDREN began wandering in. I'm not talking 8 year olds, I'm talking knee-high-to-a-grasshopper-I-can't-spell-my-own-name-CHILDREN. We were aghast; 'Oh no. No. That's just not right. Perhaps they're in the wrong theatre'. But NOOOOO more of them came streaming in. I felt as though a public announcement should be made, you know, to remind them that they're responsible for their little people?
But no announcement came. So I calmed myself and thought, 'Perhaps they've toned the movie down; made it family friendly (unlike the TV shows which are now quite sexually explicit)?'. NO. This movie has naughty stuff GALORE. Sex, boobs, a penis, the 'rude finger', a bong, alcohol abuse, abuse...But this isn't what frustrates, NAY, angers me. The Simpsons was never intended for children - anyone who's seen the show knows what their ticket is buying them - what angers me is that parents....SPLUTTER SPLUTTER...PARENTS walk into the theatre with their child in tow, dragging a box of popcorn bigger than themselves while Mummy makes herself comfortable and tries to relish the childhood she never had. Mummy wants to have fun and see a movie and 'Hey, the kids will learn about it some day?'. Well you know what, Mummy (and Daddy) GROW UP. You were responsible enough to have sex, now you have a person to look after. To grow. To expose to certain things at an appropriate age. And I don't care what you say, no child is psychologically apt to deal with the concept of a bong, binge drinking or giving people the finger. I say all this without even toughing on the fact that the movie deals with concepts such as global warming, the environmental protection agency and American politics - but hey, it's a KIDS MOVIE, take them along and let them grasp at straws; laugh at what little they understand, like a penis on a skateboard.... You may as well walk your child into the local strip joint and say 'He was going to see it someday'.
This may sound hypocritical of me, coming from someone whose last post was about the integrity of Rowling's Wizarding World but I KNOW there are issues in Harry Potter that young children should not be exposed to - I certainly won't be advocating that our children read the books until they are in high school or at an age where they fully appreciate the nature of satan, his tools and also the concept of imagination versus truth. Also, but Harry Potter is set in an entirely fictional land creating a chasm between the 'real' and the 'imaginary', The Simpsons is an outright satire of the world at present which attempts to create a chasm through the guise of being 'just a cartoon'.
Anyway, I could go on and on...but let us focus on this:
THE SIMPSONS MOVIE = PG (Parental Guidance) - These films and computer games contain material that may confuse or upset younger viewers.
(Yes, may CONFUSE younger viewers. How else are they to feel when, after seeing a penis, young Ralph declares 'I like boys now!')
HARRY POTTER (most films) = M (Mature) - These films and computer games contain material that requires a mature perspective. This classification was formerly known as M15+. There is no restriction on access. The content is moderate in impact.
Note: MA15+ (Mature Accompanied) – People under 15 must be accompanied by a parent or adult guardian for the duration of the film - parental permission to see an MA15+ film is not sufficient. People under 15 are not permitted to buy or rent films or computer games classified MA15+ unless they are accompanied by a parent or adult guardian. The content is strong in impact.
I would like to move that the Simpsons AND Harry Potter be relegated to MA15+! (In Australia, this is the next step up from M). This, as you'll have read above, does not restrict young people from seeing such films, but restricts them from seeing the movies without a parent - which I think should be standard!!! Am I getting old or what? But let it be said, and this always swims around in my mind, children are now having sex/oral sex at 12 years of age. This has nothing to do with diets, chemicals or menstrual cycles - children are being told by their latest babysitter, the TV, the Wii, the PS2 etc that this is normal. I'll leave it there. I'm tired.
It's a funny movie. Just don't take your 4 year old - for the sake of our future adults...
(On poor parenting: Melaine Griffith is under fire after she was snapped outside a Beverly Hills boutique lighting a cigarette for herself and then her teenage daughter Dakota...)
NOTE: This was posted whilst tired and without editing more than once...possibly a bad move.
